1. Paste what they sent
The coach tells you, in a line or two, what in it lands.
Paste it in, or share it straight from the app it arrived in, and say who it's from. The coach tells you, in a line or two, what in it lands.
Your conversation coach
Say it so it lands.
For the message you want to fire back at.the email you'd regret by morning.the row at bedtime.the meeting that went sideways.
App StoreComing soonJoin the waitlist
Ten free replies. Then $4.17 a month, billed yearly.
Someone has sent the message that makes your thumbs start typing. Kind Regards reads it with you, lets you say what you really think, and helps you reply in words the other person will actually hear.
A coach, not a ghostwriter. Your words, with the regret taken out.
Putting the kind back in kind regards.
How it works
Four steps, one screen at a time
2. Put it down for a bit
If it's hot, it suggests twenty minutes away before you answer.
If it's hot, it suggests twenty minutes away before you answer, and holds it for you.
3. Say it how you feel it
Type or talk, as angry as you like.
Type or talk, as angry as you like. Nobody sees this but the coach. Then pick what you actually want from it, from a few options drawn from both messages, or say it in your own words.
4. Get the reply, and the reasons
A reply in your own words, with the lines you'd regret taken out.
A reply in your own words, with the lines you'd regret taken out and one plain sentence on why each change works. Copy it, send yours anyway, or sleep on it.
When a message isn't hot, it gets straight to the reply. The screens above are the real app, with a made-up message.
How it thinks
It reads the room before it writes a word.
12 jobs
What's this message for?
Cool it down, hold a limit, repair, get a decision. There are twelve jobs a message can have, and the coach works out yours first.
139 moves
Which moves fit?
It chooses from 139, drawn from couples research, crisis negotiators, high-conflict co-parenting and the people who train managers to give hard feedback. It picks three to five for this person, this time.
What reached them last time?
It remembers which moves worked with each person, and starts there next time.
Who made it
Kind Regards is made by Tom Kirby, Head of Customer Experience and Community at Mindvalley, a leader in personal growth education. He works alongside teachers in relationships, leadership, mindfulness and business, and on the learning journeys behind their courses. He's spent nearly twenty years in customer support, replying to upset people for a living. Kind Regards is his own project, separate from Mindvalley.
It learns them
It learns the people in your life
Every reply teaches it something about the person you're talking to: what sets them off, what reaches them, how to come at the next message. Your partner, your ex, your mum, your manager, your fifteen-year-old. Each one gets replies shaped to them.
Give it a person
Hayley · Partner
With Hayley, I'd start by agreeing with the part that's true.
What I've learned about Hayley
WhoPartner
What set it offBeing told what to do
What I'll try first with themAgree with the part that's true
And you: your first instinctFire back
Sam · Co-parent
With Sam, I'd keep it to times and places, and leave the rest.
What I've learned about Sam
WhoCo-parent
What set it offPlans changed at the last minute
What I'll try first with themStick to times and places
And you: your first instinctExplain too much
Maya · Daughter, 13 to 17
With Maya, I'd keep it short and warm, and leave the door open.
What I've learned about Maya
WhoDaughter, 13 to 17
What set it offBeing told off in front of friends
What I'll try first with themShort, warm, and leave the door open
And you: your first instinctLecture
Dan · Manager
With Dan, I'd raise it early, one to one, before the next meeting.
What I've learned about Dan
WhoManager
What set it offSurprises in a meeting
What I'll try first with themRaise it early, one to one
And you: your first instinctGo quiet
Priya · Friend
With Priya, I'd own my part exactly, and no more.
What I've learned about Priya
WhoFriend
What set it offFeeling left out
What I'll try first with themOwn your part exactly
And you: your first instinctSay sorry for everything
Priya
How did it land?
BetterNo replyWorse
- What I've learned. After a reply, the coach shows you what it now knows about them, and one thing about you.
- How did it land? The next morning it asks one question. One tap, and the next reply starts from what worked.
- Home and work. Partners, co-parents, family, friends and your own children, in words pitched to their age. Managers, colleagues, clients and customers too.
- You decide who it remembers. Delete someone and everything about them goes.
The people above are made up.
The research
Built on how hard conversations actually go
20 minutes
Time to come down
How long your body can take to settle after a flood of anger. It's why the hold lasts twenty minutes.*
600 angry people
Going over it keeps you wound up
People who hit a punching bag while thinking about whoever made them angry came out angrier than people who sat still.*
154 studies
Slow it down, don't burn it off
Across 154 studies, things that slow your body down eased anger. Things that rev it up, like going for a run, didn't.*
A few slow breaths
Deep breathing was one of the things that brought anger down. That's why the hold offers it.*
Research on how people argue, not on this app.
Privacy
Your messages are for your reply, and nothing else
Nothing trains on them.
Gone after thirty days.
One tap to forget someone.
Your voice stays on your phone
When you talk instead of type, your phone turns it into text itself. The recording never leaves it.
No account to start
Try it without signing up. Sign in only when you want it to remember your people.
Never for a safety situation
If a message reads as a threat or abuse, it won't write a reply. It shows you where to get help instead.
Your messages are used to write your reply. Not to train AI, not for ads, never sold. Drafts and replies delete themselves after thirty days, and deleting a person takes everything about them with it. Read the privacy policy
Price
Free to try. Then a subscription you can cancel any time.
Free
$0
Your first ten replies, across up to three people. Every feature. No card, no clock.
Subscription
$4.17 a month
$49.99 billed yearly (two months free)
or $4.99 month to month
Unlimited replies and people. Cancel any time in your Apple settings, and your people stay.
Prices in US dollars; the App Store charges in your own currency. When the free replies run out, nothing is taken away: your people and what the coach has learned about them stay.
Questions
Fair questions
Where does the coaching come from?
From well-tested practice in couples research, negotiation, high-conflict co-parenting and workplace feedback, rewritten in plain words as 139 moves. Tom shaped it from nearly twenty years in customer support and his work at Mindvalley on the experience and learning journeys behind courses in relationships, mindfulness and personal growth.
Isn't this putting words in my mouth?
It works from your words and keeps them wherever they aren't the problem. It cuts the lines you'd regret and tells you why. You can always send your own instead.
Will they know I used an app?
Nothing in the reply says so. It's your message, sent by you.
Isn't this just manipulation with better manners?
It's the opposite, by rule. It helps you ask for what you want in a way the other person can say yes to. It won't use guilt, fear, money or the children as leverage. If your draft does, it cuts those lines and tells you why.
What if it's more than a disagreement?
Then it won't coach it. If a message reads as a threat, as control, or as a risk to a child, it shows you where to get help instead, every time.
Does it read my messages or my inbox?
Only what you paste or share into it. It never sees anything else on your phone.
Is it therapy?
No. It's a coach for one conversation at a time. If you need more than that, please talk to someone qualified.
Does it work for work?
Yes. Managers, colleagues, clients and customers, and emails as well as messages.
Say it so it lands.
Coming soon to iPhone. Join the waitlist to hear the day it lands.
App StoreComing soonJoin the waitlist